Plant a thought and reap a word;
plant a word and reap an action;
plant an action and reap a habit;
plant a habit and reap a character;
plant a character and reap a destiny.
Although these words have been attributed to several different authors, in different wordings, for more than a century, they still ring true for me. It matters what happens when you take a thought, no matter how involuntary a thought, and choose to utter that thought as words. When you repeat those words, you set the stage for action. Those actions, repeated, are by definition a habit. Your habits tell me about your character. Your character establishes your (current) destiny, consequences, and life path.
Do you want to change that destiny? Those consequences you currently face in life? Then change your words. Change what you allow to go past the filter of your mouth (or fingers typing into a computer).
Sometimes thoughts are involuntary, fleeting, and the result of years of input, struggles, and beliefs. But you are NOT a slave to your thoughts. You *can* channel your inner dialogue into more mature and thoughtful behavior, respect, and your mature values.
Trust, once broken, is painfully difficult to rebuild, and not always something that *can* be rebuilt. Own your own mistakes in life. Own your choices in words. And never blame a victim who was harmed for “making you do it.” No. You are the owner of your own choices.
And if you have personal thoughts that are not worthy of your personal beliefs, learn a new habit: Change what you decide to say outloud. Figure out the values that matter to you and use your words to speak about those values. Build the words into action, habit, character, and destiny.